


A Season of Change

by ferric



Series: Home Sweet Home [3]
Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: M/M, domestic AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-08-15
Updated: 2013-08-15
Packaged: 2017-12-23 13:12:12
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,232
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/926855
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ferric/pseuds/ferric
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Levi was getting used to people coming in and leaving from his life.</p>
            </blockquote>





	A Season of Change

**Author's Note:**

> This takes place after “A Matter of Trust." The briefly mentioned bit of science is definitely made-up, but feel free to ask me to elaborate if you wish. 
> 
> If you squint really really hard, maybe some Levi/Jean
> 
> Domestic AU in order: ”To Us, The Beginning:” ”A Matter of Trust;” “A Season of Change;” ”Home Sweet Home.”

It began, as with most things in Levi’s life as of late, with Eren.

Levi had gone with Eren to the local junior high school for the enrollment paperwork, or rather, he had dragged Eren along with him because Eren was more interested in enjoying the last of his summer with his friends. The paperwork shouldn’t take very long, Levi had told himself when Eren made a face as they got out of the car.

However, this particular adventure had ended with Eren very much not enrolled in the school, and Levi very much frustrated.

The problem was that even though they lived within a ten minute drive, apparently, Eren couldn’t attend this school because he wasn’t in the fucking school district, and apparently, because some asshole who had way too much fun scribbling shitty school district lines over the state map, Eren had to attend a different junior high also a ten minute drive from their apartment. Apparently, even though there was no fucking difference that Levi could see, Levi had to drive to the other junior high and do the paperwork there.

“They’re both three miles away,” Levi muttered irritably to himself. The only thing was, Levi had liked this school more because it was in a better district, and also, the path to the other school had a long highway bridge where there was no sidewalk. If Levi had to leave for business trips, Eren would have problems walking to school by himself. Levi had voiced this concern, but the only thing he got in a reply was a shrug and an _“I’m sorry, but the administration’s rules are beyond my control.”_ Levi would have to look into public bus routes then, since the school district had cut down on school buses after the last funding crisis, something which he had gotten a very detailed letter about.

Levi turned to Eren. “Let’s go to the other school and see what we can get done.” The sooner this was completed, the faster Eren could return to lazing around for the rest of summer. However, when Levi saw the expression on Eren’s face, he asked, “What’s wrong?” 

“It’s nothing,” said Eren, as he shook his head to clear away the crestfallen expression and buckled his seatbelt.

“Just spit it out,” said Levi.

“It’s not a big deal.” Eren looked straight ahead and did not meet Levi’s eyes.

Levi held his tongue and did not say, _“But you look like someone had just died,”_ instead, he said, “What, do you like this school that much?” It did have a very good soccer team, from what Levi had heard.

“I don’t like it that much.”

“Well, what is it then?” Levi asked, crossing his arms and leaning back on the seat. “We’re sitting here until you spit it out.”

“But I don’t want to be late for the book club meeting,” Eren said in a tone that tried to minimize as much whining as possible but still kept in a little to guilt Levi.

“Fine with me,” said Levi, even though he really wasn’t, and Eren’s not-whine almost worked. Levi wanted Eren to be on time to the meeting because he actually approved of this hobby that Armin dragged Eren in, but Levi tried not to give in. “It’s my day off. I don’t have to go anywhere.”

“We can’t do anything about the rules,” Eren mumbled, although it was becoming clear that he wanted to tell Levi with that almost-pout he was putting on. Levi wanted to roll his eyes because even though Eren said that, he obviously hoped that Levi could do something about it. 

“I can’t do anything if I don’t even know what the problem is,” Levi pointed out, and Eren turned to him then, hesitant.

“Mikasa and Armin are both going to this school.”

“And you can’t be separated from them,” Levi said, understanding finally dawning on him.

“I can be separated from them,” Eren said stubbornly, and Levi quickly replied with a “Sure” before Eren could go on a rant about how he was not a weakling and could survive without the support of the two friends, who were so close to him they might as well be his limbs.

This was going to be a problem that Levi would mull over for a while. He had a solution in mind, but…

“Wait, why are you moving apartments?” Hanji asked over the phone while Levi was lining up print-outs of the different apartments that were only within thirty minutes away, but they were in the right school district. Three neat rows of print-outs organized by distance from the school stared back at him. 

“I need to get Eren in a better school district,” said Levi, wincing over the price of each apartment. Of course, given their locations, they were all more expensive than his current place. The local high school was infamous for its rigorous academics and wide expanse of extracurricular, so Levi didn’t want to imagine the price of the rented homes around this area just for that reason.

“Yes, of course,” Hanji said. “Well, did you find anything?”

“I found a lot.” Levi picked up the one with his favorite location and tried to imagine how light his paycheck would become if they moved there.

“But they’re more expensive,” Hanji read his thought. “Are you sure you don’t want Eren to stay in the school district that you guys are in now?”

“I could afford the move,” Levi answered. “It’s not like I actually spend all of the money I earn. Besides, this saves the hassle of getting Eren into a better high school later on. The percentage of students from this high school who go on to a higher academic institution is ridiculously high.” The district that Levi had grown up in wasn’t bad, but this school district was a whole new level.

“I’m just surprised that you put so much thought into this. Your life before Eren had been pretty boring,” Hanji said, and Levi could imagine her nodding along to her words. He chose to ignore her jibe, however.

“Also, the brat doesn’t want to be separated from his two limbs,” Levi added as an afterthought, hoping that Hanji wouldn’t pick up on—

“Aww, you don’t want him to lose his friends,” Hanji cooed, and Levi quickly hissed, “Shut up!” before she could continue on to say more embarrassing things.

“I’m glad to hear that you two are doing so well,” Hanji said. “One of these days, I definitely have to meet Eren.”

“You certainly can when you get your ass down here and help us move,” said Levi.

“Why yes, Levi. I will help you. Thank you for asking so nicely.”

“Sure,” said Levi. “How are Mike and the kids?”

“They’re fine,” Hanji said, and there was something strange about her voice that Levi had to tear his attention away from the list of apartments. “Having fun without me in Minnesota.”

“What are they doing there without you?”

“Vacation,” Hanji replied, although Levi had a feeling that there was something else that she wasn’t telling him. “I still have to finish my thesis or else I won’t be able to graduate.”

“Fun comes later, right.” Hanji sounded normal again, and Levi returned his attention to his desk, crossing out all the places with three bedrooms. They didn’t need that much space and renting any of those places would be a stretch on his finances.

“My research is fun,” Hanji protested. “But the writing part is killing me.” There was a slamming of computer keys in the background, and Levi was sure that Hanji just added a bunch of rubbish on to her poor thesis.

“What’s the page count?”

“Only thirty-four out of one hundred and fifty,” Hanji groaned, and now Levi heard something that sounded like metal scratching against the keys, and he wondered if she was rolling her face against the keyboard. She probably was, the weirdo. “Can we talk about something else? Let’s talk about something else. How’s the apartment thing going?”

“We’ve just talked about this.” Levi organized all the apartment listings in the order of decreasing preference, and then gathered them in a pile. “I’ll probably make some calls soon and ask for viewing appointments.”

“Why don’t you bring Eren along with you to the apartment viewings?”

“I don’t know if he will be interested,” Levi said, remembering that Eren had wanted to spend every moment of summer with his friends. Eren had been disagreeable when Levi dragged him along to do the school’s paperwork.

It turned out, strangely enough, that Eren actually volunteered to view the apartments with him. When Levi explained why they had to move, it took Eren a grand total of five minutes to feel guilty about causing more trouble for Levi before his face lighted up in excitement at the prospect of staying with his friends. “It’s not like I need to stay with them,” Eren had reminded Levi, and Levi had nodded along, “Yes, yes,” as they both pretended that Eren wasn’t emotionally attached to Mikasa and Armin as if they were his own family.

Of course, this was quickly followed by, “Wait, what does “academic rigor” mean?”

“It means that I will be tutoring you for a long time,” said Levi, and Eren groaned in response, slumping his head against the couch pillow. Levi turned his attention back on to the nature show they were watching and added, “At least they have a good soccer team.”

“Okay,” Eren mumbled as he watched eagles soaring across the sky on the TV screen. “Do you think I’ll make the team?”

“With all your summer training? You better.”

“We’re having our last game this Friday,” Eren said with what Levi thought was fake-casualness.

“I’ll be working late this Friday,” Levi said, feeling guilty that he hadn’t made it to any of Eren’s games. They all ended mid-afternoon when he still had work, so even if Levi wasn’t working late, he still wouldn’t be able to go. 

“I’m just saying that I have a game.” Eren buried his head into the pillow until only his eyes were visible. “You don’t have to come.”

“Alright.” Levi shrugged. “There’ll be another apartment viewing right after I get off work this Friday,” he said as a consolation, and it had the intended effect because Eren suddenly perked up.

“Is it another apartment where the tenants are still there?” Eren sounded excited at this prospect. He seemed to enjoy Levi’s cleaning rant when it wasn’t directed at him but someone else.

“Yes,” Levi sighed, already having bad flashback to the last apartment they had visited, where the tenants were still living there and making a mess of the place as if they were pigs instead of actual human beings. _Fuck, why would you even leave the floor that nasty? Was it that difficult to sweep up all the hair?_

“Hair shedding is actually pretty normal,” Eren said, as if he knew that Levi was thinking. “Mikasa’s room is filled to the corners with hair.”

“I don’t want to know that.” Levi glared at Eren; the image made him felt the urge to sweep up his own floor even though it was spotless. “I already have to deal with your hair. Don’t think I haven’t noticed how you’ve kicked all the hair underneath the rug in your room.”

“I’ll clean it right away,” Eren said hastily. “Please don’t start your cleaning rant.”

“If you don’t want me to rant, you should have cleaned your room properly.” Levi was about to rant, but he decided to spare Eren this time. “Get to it tonight.”

“I will,” Eren groaned. “After TV.”

“Sure.”

But Eren didn’t get a chance to clean anything because Levi woke up in the middle of the night with Eren drooling on his shoulder. Levi realized that they both fell asleep while the TV was still on, except now it was showing an infomercial featuring a bunch of people spilling milk everywhere but their cereal bowl because it was difficult to pour carefully with a new carton of milk, and wow, Levi really needed more sleep because the product they were selling was starting to make sense to his sleep-deprived mind, and he was almost tempted to pick up the phone to get it in four easy payment of $9.99.

Luckily, Levi still had some sense left in him. He turned off the TV and reached for the blanket underneath the coffee table, but then Eren slipped from his shoulder and fell onto the couch, twitching a little with the sudden movement but still deep asleep. Levi contemplated going back to his bedroom, but then when he realized how lazy he was, he unfolded the blanket and draped it over Eren before slipping in next to him.

“Goodnight,” Levi muttered, and before his mind drifted off to dreams again, he thought of how warm it was to be next to Eren, and even though the summer heat was going to have him bathing in sweat the next morning, and it was going to be disgusting, he really didn’t mind one bit.

***

Even though Levi had told Eren that he couldn’t make it to Eren’s soccer game, that didn’t mean he wasn’t looking at the clock anxiously. He wondered if Eren’s team won the game, and perhaps if they did, Levi could take him out for ice cream, or even if they didn’t win, there would still be ice cream. Levi didn’t like ice cream, but it was summer, so maybe he could go for a smoothie from the shop next door. He had just received the call from the landlord of the apartment that they were going to view today, and due to some complications with the tenants, they couldn’t view it today. Levi had hoped that translated to, _“The tenants will clean their shit before you view the apartment.”_

He must have looked more frazzled than usual because Petra, who worked on the desk across from him, asked, “Are you alright?”

“I’m fine,” said Levi, and usually he would end the conversation there, but perhaps living with Eren had loosen his tongue a little because he found himself saying, “Eren is having his last soccer game today, and I can’t make it.”

It wasn’t until Petra asked, “Who’s Eren?” that Levi realized he had been talking too much about his personal life than he had wanted to.

“Just family who’s living with me,” Levi answered.

“I didn’t know you’re living with someone,” Petra said, seeming surprised that Levi actually continued the conversation. Levi was surprised himself. “How old is Eren?” Then, as if her words finally caught up to her mind, she quickly added, “Oh, I’m sorry. I don’t mean to pry.”

“It’s fine.” Levi wondered if he was that unapproachable. He probably was. It occurred to him that he had never spoken to Petra about anything besides work, even though they had been working in the same office for years. “He’s going into junior high this coming fall.”

“Oh, that’s exciting.” Petra genuinely sounded like it was exciting. “Is he attending school locally, or..” She trailed off, and Levi waited for her to finish her sentence, only she never did.

“He’s probably going to Santa Rosa Junior High.” If Levi got the school district thing straightened out, that was, and then hopefully Eren would be able to attend Sina High afterwards.

“So he’s living with you while attending school then?” Petra asked, looking a little awkward with her phrasing, and it took Levi a while to realize why their conversation was going so stiffly.

“I took him in after his parents passed away,” Levi explained, and he could see understanding dawning on Petra’s face as all the pieces connected together.

“I’m sorry, I just…I didn’t mean to pry, but I was curious,” Petra stumbled over her words. “I’m sorry, that must be hard on both of you.”

“It’s been harder for him than it has been for me.”

“Right,” Petra looked less petrified than usual when she had to deal with him, and Levi considered this an accomplishment of his that he would report to Hanji later. “You know, if you want, I could go through all the account-checks and inventory for you today so you can leave early for Eren’s game.”

Levi was tempted to snatch her offer, but he restrained himself. “It’s alright. I can do it.”

“Oh, are you sure?”

Suddenly, Levi thought of all the time that people in the office had offered him something, like the early mornings when Erd had asked if he wanted a coffee, or the occasional office lunch when Petra had asked him if he wanted to come along, or the days where Auruo, on the rare chances that he actually had the heart in him to do something for someone else, had asked Levi if he wanted something from the downstairs lounge before everyone chimed in with something they had wanted, just to give Auruo a hard time because he was a hard bastard to get along with, or the many times Gunter had asked if he wanted help with the giant load of work on his desk when it was nearly eight in the evening, and all of those moments came back to Levi, clearer than ever, all those moments he had said _“no”_ and retreated back into himself, and eventually those offers came less and less frequent, and something that felt very close to loneliness had clawed inside him.

So it shocked both Petra and Levi himself when Levi said, “I think I’ll take you up on that offer.”

***

Levi felt strangely liberated when he left the office. The light feeling continued as he walked to his car in the parking lot, and he wasn’t sure why he was feeling this way. He didn’t like asking Petra for a favor, but it had felt nice when she agreed with a smile, like she genuinely wanted to help him, and Levi had promised that he would make it up to her later.

“Come out to lunch with the office next Monday,” Petra had said, and Levi had agreed.

A lot of strange things were happening to Levi this Friday, and he had a bizarre thought that he felt like adding another.

“Hey Hanji, you want to meet Eren right?”

***

“You are my savior” was the first thing Hanji said when Levi picked her up from campus.

“You’re only saying that because you’re getting free food out of this,” Levi said as she got in his car, dumping her backpack on the back seat, looking cheerful like her usual self, but Levi didn’t miss the exhaustion that seemed to cling on her every movement. “Thesis not going well?”

“Nope because I’m still stuck on page 34!”

“Is everything alright?” Levi frowned. Hanji was quite diligent, and it was not normal to see her still hovering over the same page count for a week.

“I’m just editing the pages right now before I add more things to them,” Hanji said as she stretched and yawned. “Let’s go! I want a smoothie. And to see Eren, of course.”

“Yeah, yeah,” Levi said. “It’s too bad that we’ll miss his game by the time we get there.”

Hanji stared at him then, and her inquisitive gaze was burning the side of his face. “What is it?”

“Nothing,” Hanji chuckled. “It’s one thing to hear about papa Levi over the phone, but it’s another to actually see him in real life.”

“Shut up, Hanji.” Levi could feel something frighteningly close to embarrassment creeping on his face, and before he could make a sarcastic comment, Hanji said so softly that Levi almost didn’t hear her.

“It makes me relieved that you’ll be okay without me.”

“Hanji? Are you alright?”

“Yeah.” Hanji had a smile that he didn’t quite believed was real when she met his eyes. “Let’s go see Eren!”

“I know I’m a shitty friend,” said Levi. “But you can tell me things. Listening is the least I could do.”

Hanji’s smile dropped, and she looked away. “Could you give me some time?”

“Sure,” Levi said. The ride to Eren’s soccer game was uncomfortable, but at least Hanji wasn’t forcing herself to be overly cheerful to hide the fact that she was miserable inside. There was something about this situation that reminded him of their fall-out back when they were still in college, and Levi tightened his grip on the steering wheel and tried not to think about the loneliness that overwhelmed him when Hanji was gone from his life. 

***

The game was already over by the time Levi and Hanji arrived at the field, and before Levi could point out which kid was Eren from the crowd of people, Eren had spotted him first and sprinted to where they were. Levi internally hissed at the grass and dirt stains that Eren had managed to accumulate from the game, already thinking about the new stain remover that he wanted to try, but then all of this thoughts stopped because Eren was grinning the biggest grin that Levi had ever seen on his face, and something warm was threatening to break on his face, but he controlled his neutral expression as Eren shouted, “You came!”

Eren had to catch his breath when he reached them, but his expression seemed to brighten once he looked up at Levi, and Levi blurted out before he could rephrase his sentence better, “I’m sorry that I’ve missed your game.”

This shocked everyone, especially Hanji who was definitely raising an eyebrow next to him. Levi was annoyed. Surely he had apologize before at some point in his life? He must have.

“It’s okay, as long as you’re here,” Eren said, and his words were doing very funny things to Levi’s heart right now. Even though Eren was dirty, and Levi didn’t bring hand sanitizer, Levi reached out his hand to ruffle Eren’s hair anyway, and Eren laughed, swatting his hand away. “Quit it!”

“I also thought that I didn’t need the watch the game since I already know what the outcome will be,” said Levi, and Eren’s grin got wider, if that was even possible.

“Do you want to see our trophy?” Eren asked excitedly.

“Before I do, I want you to meet someone,” and at Levi’s words, Eren finally noticed Hanji, who gave him a little salute.

“Hanji Zoe here! Levi’s only friend reporting for duty!”

“I have other friends too,” Levi said irritably. He did…Didn’t he? Wait, Irvin counted. Yes, Irvin definitely counted.

“Hello,” Eren said, studying Hanji with a cautious look on his face. “Nice to meet you.”

“Nice to meet you too!” Hanji smiled. “Actually, I’m here to check on you today. I have two kids myself, and since it’s Levi we’re talking about, I just want to make sure he’s treating you kindly.”

There was something in Hanji’s words that made Eren relaxed slightly, but Levi just thought it was Eren succumbing to Hanji’s charm. Probably. 

“She’ll be staying with us for the night since her husband and kids abandoned her to go on a vacation,” Levi explained, and Hanji protested.

“Excuse me? I thought you dragged me into this because you wanted get out of cooking duty for the night.” Hanji then turned to Eren. “I make a mean casserole.”

“It’s the only thing you _can_ make,” Levi pointed out. “And no, you look like you’re about to collapse, and it’s my house, so I’ll be making the food.”

“You could probably have my room for the night,” Eren said, and Levi gave him a questioning look. “I usually sleep on the couch now anyway.”

“Levi!” Hanji scolded him, but Levi quickly explained, “We usually fall asleep after watching TV. Don’t worry; he sleeps properly before a game and during the school year.”

“I should have told you that she was coming earlier,” said Levi. “But I just really wanted you to meet her.”

“It’s alright,” Eren said, his initial reservation slowly wearing off.

“Aren’t you going to show me your trophy?” Levi asked.

“Yes!” And that was enough to cheer Eren up, if only by a little. “As long as you don’t do the embarrassing taking pictures thing.”

_Oh._

Levi was _definitely_ doing the embarrassing taking pictures thing.

He didn’t say anything as Eren led them toward the group of children and parents hovering over the benches, but as soon as Eren got next to the trophy right by the sport drinks cooler, Levi immediately took a picture with his phone just as Eren turned to him, beaming brightly with pride. That smile quickly turned into an expression of annoyance and abashment, and Levi got a picture of that too before Eren whined, _“Levi!”_

Before Levi could properly take more shots of Eren being annoyed with him, someone spoke over his shoulders. “Maybe we could gather the kids together for a group picture.” A woman with a kind smile met his eyes. “I’m Marco Bodt’s mother,” she introduced herself. “Madeline.”

“Levi,” Levi shook her offered hand. “I’m Eren’s guardian.”

“It’s the first time that I’ve seen you at a game, so I just want to introduce myself.”

“I usually have work.” Levi felt bad even though he knew that he didn’t have a choice in the matter. Today was just a special exception.

“Oh no, I totally understand. I’m glad you can make it.” She turned to Eren who was watching them curiously. “In that case, we definitely should get a group picture for you then.”

Levi was going to decline, but Madeline moved fast, and before Levi knew it, he was shaking hands with a whole lot more people than he planned to today, and he had to explain about five times that _no_ , Hanji was just a friend and nothing more. It was disorientating, but he did get a lot of welcoming smiles, and considering that he had never met these people before, it wasn’t bad. Levi felt less guilty about being unable to make it to Eren’s games when he found out that there were more children than there were parents. The coach explained that he was going to keep an eye on the kids before their parents came to pick them up.

Hanji was sociable, but Levi felt that she was more reserved than usual. It was strange because Hanji was always one of the loud ones in the group; in college she was a funny drunk; in grad school she was a funnier drunk, according to her colleagues, and whenever they went out somewhere together, she would be in the middle of the events, while Levi would silently watch from the sideline, making sure that she didn’t get in trouble. Sometimes he would bring a book along. Levi wanted to ask her what was wrong, public place be damned because she was being really weird right now, but then he was carried away by the conversations around him again, and he lost the chance to talk to her. 

The children took forever to line up properly around the trophy, and Levi noted with pride that Eren was one of the taller ones in the back. Levi took several pictures of the whole group and a few pictures of just Eren and his small group of friends—Mikasa next to him and Armin right in front—and when he took another careful look at the group of kids, he realized that Jean Kirstein was there. Levi didn’t see his mother among the group of parents, so that was a big relief.

After everyone (mainly the parents) was satisfied with picture taking, the group broke off as people began heading home.

Levi patted Eren on the back, “Since you didn’t do that bad of a job, let’s go get ice-cream.”

“Can Armin and Mikasa come too?” Eren asked excitedly. They never bought ice-cream because Levi didn’t like it, and so it had been a while since Eren had gotten to eat any. 

“Of course.”

Then, Eren said hesitantly, “Can Marco come too?”

“Marco?”

“Remember when the bottom of my sneakers fell out? He was the one who loaned me another pair.” Levi had distinctly remembered this episode because he had been wondering what the hell Eren did to his shoes, and he also remembered that shoe shopping with Eren was particularly annoying.

“Oh I see. Sure.” Levi liked Marco’s mother, and Marco himself seemed like a nice kid. Besides, Marco’s mother was just telling him about the stain remover that he was thinking of trying, and they hadn’t finished talking about it.

An unexpected problem came up. Apparently, Marco was Jean’s best friend, and apparently, Madeline was going to take him home because his mother wasn’t here. Eren had asked Marco about the ice-cream trip, and even though Madeline agreed right away, Marco had looked at Jean awkwardly, and Jean gave Levi a look before turning his gaze away quickly.

Levi realized that Eren had blatantly not invited Jean, something that Madeline didn’t notice but Levi did, and man, he was going to talk to Eren about this later. Marco looked between Eren and Jean, and Jean was determined not to look anyone in the eye, and honestly, Levi didn’t like Jean or care much for this kid (this was especially true for his mother), but Levi didn’t want to be a complete asshole to a little boy. They couldn’t possibly all go celebrate and leave him out.

“Do you not like ice-cream, Jean?” Levi asked, and Jean met his eyes then before looking away.

Eren crossed his arms, looking very displeased at Levi’s implicit invitation for Jean, and Levi gave him a glare until Eren dropped his hands to his sides, although his expression was still looking quite unpleasant.

“I’m not…I’m not allowed…My mom doesn’t want me to eat ice-cream,” Jean said softly.

“Well that’s too bad,” Eren said, and Levi smoothly interrupted him before he could say something that would start an argument.

“We could get smoothies instead while everyone else gets ice-cream, “Levi shrugged. “Actually, Hanji and I are getting one too because we’re not fans of ice-cream ourselves.”

“Really?” Jean met his eyes then. He still looked like he was afraid that Levi was going to kill him, but at least he was meeting Levi’s gaze.

“Yeah,” Levi said. “We shouldn’t make anyone feel left out from the celebration.” He gave Eren another look, and Eren seemed embarrassed at getting caught by Levi. 

“Thank you,” Jean said, sounding unexpectedly sincere, and then he was looking at Levi with that curious gaze again, the same one that he had given Levi in front of the principal’s office, and before Levi could ponder more on this, Eren jumped into his vision, blocking Jean from Levi’s sight.

“Let’s all get smoothies,” said Eren.

Next to him, Hanji snickered, and Madeline seemed amused. Levi didn’t quite understand what was so funny, but whatever.

“Are you sure?” Levi asked. “You’ve been bugging me to buy you ice-cream ever since the start of summer.”

“I could live without it,” Eren said, taking Levi by his hand to drag him off. “Let’s go now.”

“Alright, you don’t have to walk so fast. Eren!”

***

Levi discovered that Eren really had a thing against Jean. After they got smoothies, Eren was very insistent on standing between Levi and Jean, and as much as Levi appreciated being protected by a child, he really didn’t. Levi sighed and focused on talking with Madeline and Hanji instead since he was too tired to deal with children’s mind games right now, and the whole time, Hanji looked as if she had wanted to laugh, and Levi had to kick her a few times subtly.

At least the rest of the children behaved, even if Eren didn’t.

Before Madeline, Marco, and Jean went on their way, Jean had ran up to Levi and said, “Thanks. Sorry about…last time. You’re pretty cool for doing this,” while scratching the back of his neck. “You’re pretty cool in general.”

Levi said, “Thanks. And don’t worry about it. I’m not one to hold a grudge,” even though that wasn’t quite true—he could get really resentful. Jean gave him that strange stare again, before Eren cut in.

“Jean, Marco’s mom is waiting for you.”

“Right.” Jean looked away, and as he went to catch up to Madaline and Marco, he turned back and gave Levi one last glimpse of his embarrassed face, “Thanks, Levi!” before running off.

“Was that the same kid that Eren got into a fight with?” Hanji asked.

“Yeah.”

“Well, that was certainly amusing,” Hanji said, sounding like she wanted to laugh.

“It really wasn’t,” Eren said, still looking upset about something.

Levi had no idea what they were talking about.

*** 

They had a light dinner of cream mushroom soup and sourdough bread because of the afternoon smoothie and because Levi wanted to finish the rest of the bread before it went bad. Hanji seemed very excited at the prospect of talking about her research because she tried to rope Levi into asking about it the whole time. However, Levi had known her since forever and knew how to dodge the topic carefully.

Eren, however, wasn’t quite as skilled because when Hanji was talking about one of her lab mates, he had asked, “Wait, what do you work on, Hanji?”

“No,” Levi said, but it was too late because Hanji slammed her spoon on the table.

“Do you want to know??”

“Y..yes?” Eren jumped at Hanji’s sudden burst of energy, and Levi said, “No, Hanji, he doesn’t want to know. Leave him alone.”

“You want to know.” Hanji nodded as her grin widened. “I could see it in your eyes.”

“Umm, okay?” Eren said nervously, and Levi sighed as he began clearing the table. It was going to take a long time. He could probably finish washing the dishes and wipe down the table before Hanji was done.

Sure enough, by the time Levi had finished cleaning up everything and wiped down the kitchen floor twice, Hanji was still going on about her research. “Of course, the commercial stuff is excellent, but if you use organic solvents, the oil material positioned on the nanoparticles would be washed away.”

“I see,” Eren nodded with a daze look on his face, and it was clear that he definitely didn’t understand, but Hanji was talking way too fast for Eren to stop her.

“Our coating works on all substances, of course,” Hanji clasped her hands together in excitement. “There is a small toxicity problem though.”

“Toxicity is a giant problem,” Levi cut in smoothly, and before Hanji could drag him into the debate, he quickly added. “Now, I would love to keep talking about this, but you both need a shower. Eren, you go first since you reek of sweat. Gross.”

“Okay!” Eren immediately got out of the table, grateful for Levi’s save, and Levi had an urge to laugh as Eren nearly ran from the room.

“You really shouldn’t bully him like that.”

“I just had to give him the full charming Hanji experience,” Hanji said, and Levi finally gave into the urge to roll his eyes for the first time. He realized how much he had missed seeing Hanji’s strange sense of humor in front of him.

***

Levi woke up in the middle of the night, the summer heat pooling around his body. He kicked the sheets off and rolled over to the cooler part of the bed, untouched by body heat. Levi had hoped that he would fall back asleep, except his body decided to remind him this instant that he had too much liquid today. Levi rose from his bed with a groan; he really didn’t want to get up, but he couldn’t fall back asleep until he’d used the restroom.

The floor was cool underneath his feet as Levi blindly padded to the restroom right outside his bedroom, but then the muted noises of the TV filtering into the hallway from the living room woke his mind up completely. _Was Hanji still up?_

Levi was about to go and scold Hanji for being up so late even though she looked like she would collapse from exhaustion when he heard Hanji’s voice, soft but clear over the TV noises, “Levi has changed.”

Levi stopped in his track when he heard Eren’s voice. “Did he really?”

All the sleepiness left Levi when he realized that he was stumbling on a conversation that he wasn’t supposed to hear, and Levi wondered if he should walk away from this, only he was so curious of what they had to say, especially Hanji. Levi didn’t think he had changed that much; he was no less of “Levi” than he was yesterday or the day before.

“He had always been distant and closed off,” Hanji said softly, and there was a sadness in her voice that reminded him of the days when he had listened to her voicemails and didn’t call back because he didn’t want to hear any more words of sympathy, because it was too much, because he was scared that he was going to break apart and he didn’t want her to see because she had been so important. “But I’ve seen more of him today than I’ve managed for four years in college.”

Levi didn’t hear Eren’s reply, and for a long time, he stood there, leaning against the wall, letting Hanji’s words sank in heavily in his heart.

“It’s all because he has you,” Hanji said. “Even though I wished that I could have been the one—I wished that I could have done more for him, but I—” Levi clenched his eyes closed just as he heard Hanji’s sharp intake of breath, and suddenly it was hard to breathe because he knew exactly what she was thinking about, the days, the months after the loss of his parents were too much to bear, and back then everything was too much to bear, and he had shut her out, and he had shut everyone else out as well because he was afraid of so many things that loneliness was worth the price, and when that fear slowly cooled as the years passed, he had realized that he didn’t want to be alone, but by then, the space by his side was empty. _Hanji._

“You’re a good kid, Eren,” Hanji said. “I’m really happy that he has you. Please take care of him for me.”

“I will.”

“I’m really glad that he’s going to be okay. I just—I’m really happy. I’m sorry. I’m a really selfish person. I’ve pushed responsibilities that I should have taken on to your shoulders.”

“I don’t mind,” Eren said, and Eren’s strength amidst Hanji’s uncertainties surprised Levi. “He has me, and I have him. We’ll both be okay.”

“You’re very strong,” Hanji said, and Levi had to agree.

“Levi is strong too,” Eren said. “You shouldn’t underestimate him.”

Hanji chuckled. “Perhaps you’ll get to know more about Levi than I ever will.”

Their conversation ended there, but Levi stood there for a long time, bathing in the comfortable silent. He didn’t leave until he heard Eren stood from the sofa to get back to bed, and even when he returned to his bedroom, Hanji’s sadness still lingered in his mind as he drifted off to sleep. 

***

When Levi walked into the kitchen the next morning, fully intend to make breakfast before Hanji and Eren were up, he found Hanji already finished making toasts and frying eggs.

“Morning!” Hanji said as she placed the plates of food on the table. She even set up the table and everything; plates and cups and milk carton and orange juice carton all out and waiting.

“You’re up early,” Levi said.

“I just want to thank you for letting me stay over rather than leaving me to die slowly in my house all alone,” Hanji said as she sat down on the table. “Help yourself.”

“Will do.”

As Levi took some eggs and a piece of toast on to his plate, he could feel Hanji’s gaze burning his face. “What is it?”

“It’s just—I’ve done a lot of thinking yesterday, and I have something to tell you,” Hanji said.

“Me too.” Levi placed his food aside, glad that they were getting to the point now. “I have something I want to say too.”

“Do you want to go first?”

“No,” Levi said. “You go first.”

“Alright.” Hanji took a deep breath and cleared her throat before she said. “I’m moving to Minnesota.”

“You are?” Levi was shocked, but he had a strange feeling that he had secretly knew that she would say this to him someday. All the pieces clicked together then.

“Yeah, Mike and the kids are already settling up there, and once I finish my thesis, I’ll join them,” Hanji said. “It’s not…it’s not a sudden decision. Mike found a job up there, and I’ll be doing my post-doc there next spring.”

“Congrats,” Levi said. “That’s coming soon. Why didn’t you tell me?”

Hanji swallowed, and Levi remembered her voice from last night, lost and confused and filled with worries, and Levi could take a guess.

“Do you remember when we graduated from college?”

Levi looked down at his hands. “Yeah,” he said softly.

“God, I..I really didn’t want to leave you like that,” Hanji said, and Levi could see her digging her hands into her hair at the edge of his sight. “And I knew I shouldn’t because I knew you weren’t okay, but I was selfish and scared and I didn’t know what to do—”

“I know.”

“I just—you wouldn’t—”

“I know.”

“But even before that, I knew that I was losing you,” Hanji said. “You were slipping away from me, from Irvin, from everybody, and I knew that I had to drag you back before something happened and I wouldn’t be able to see you again, ever…”

“But I didn’t do it,” Levi said. “It’s okay. All of that is over.”

“I didn’t know what to do, and when you cut off all contacts—”

“I know, I’m sorry,” Levi said, and this was what scared him the most, that he was hurting Hanji, that he was hurting everybody, and he couldn’t bear to see that, but at the same time, back then, he couldn’t stop the grief that was swallowing him whole, and he couldn’t stand another moment of the people around him suffering because of him anymore; he was scared of seeing them hurt; he was scared of seeing them leaving him, and so he left them; he ran because that was the only thing he knew how to do.

“Hanji. Hanji look at me,” Levi grabbed her hand. “It’s over. I’m okay now.”

“And then years later when I got a hold of you, I still didn’t know what to do. I was still useless because all I could do was call you and see you sometimes and hope everyday that you are okay and—” Hanji was speaking too fast, and she was losing herself quickly, and Levi didn’t want to see her like this because he had dragged her to this point, and it wasn’t her fault; it wasn’t her fault at all, and Levi felt that urge to run away again, but he held himself back because not this time. He couldn’t afford to do it again this time. 

“Hanji, it’s okay, really.”

“When you took in Eren I was so relieved because I had hoped that meant you were getting better. I’m so selfish; I knew that I shouldn’t place such a heavy burden on a small child but I just—I’m sorry.”

“Hanji.”

Levi gripped her hand tightly as she rested her head on her arm, her shoulders shaking from the tears that she was trying to hold back, and Levi rubbed the back of her hand gently. They stayed like that for a while, and Levi forced himself to listen to every one of Hanji’s sob and they hurt, but he had to make up for the years of running away and hurting Hanji, hurting everybody, and now he was going to stay and bear it. Stayed because there were people that were important to him, and he had to remember that.

When the shaking of Hanji’s shoulders began to slow, Levi found his voice again.

“You’re never useless,” Levi said, and Hanji slowly looked up at him. “Not to me, ever.”

“I haven’t done anything.”

“I was okay because even though I’ve ran, you came back,” Levi said. “I was lost for a long time, wandering, and even when I found a job, I had wanted to run away again. I had it all planned out even though I didn’t know what I was running away from, but then one day, you called. And then you called again. And again. And I stopped. I wanted to stay.”

“Hanji,” Levi leaned forward and took both of her hands in his. “Even now, I don’t quite understand my feelings back then; there is no way your past self would have known. But all you need to know now is that I’m okay because of you, and I’m getting better because I have Eren. I’m going to be okay. You’re not abandoning me.”

Hanji nodded slowly, and Levi said, “You deserve to be happy. You deserve that post-doc position. You deserve to chase your dreams. You won’t lose me if you leave.” As Levi thought about his words, he knew that they were true. He wasn’t the same person he was years ago.

“You’ve changed.” Hanji smiled softly.

“Hopefully for the better.” Levi thought about Eren and Petra and Madeline and even Jean and all the people that he had the chance to meet, all the people that came into his life because he had taken a step to let Eren in, and he knew that he was going to be okay.

“Yeah,” Hanji said, grinning even with her red puffy eyes. “Definitely for the better.”

Levi didn’t smile, but he did look like he was thinking about smiling at some point.

“I’ll miss you, you know,” Hanji said. “You’re a difficult person to leave behind.”

“Must be because of my shitty personality,” said Levi, knowing that he was going to miss her dearly, but he wasn’t going to say that aloud. He wasn’t that open to changes yet. “You damn masochist.”

Hanji giggled. “So, now that I’ve said what I needed to say. What did you want to tell me? I’m curious now, since apparently you’ve been thinking about it all night.”

“Hanji.” Levi’s expression turned serious. “Dirty laundry goes in the washing machine, not on top of it.”

Hanji’s laugh woke Eren up.

***

Eren had taken a liking to Hanji, and Levi was glad to see that. However, Hanji’s conversation had really gotten into Eren’s head because Eren had told him after they dropped Hanji off at the university, “You’ll still have me when she leaves.”

Levi gave Eren a look. “I’m the one who’s taking care of you, brat.”

“You keep telling yourself that,” said Eren, and Levi gave him a playful shove on the shoulder.

“Shut up. Let’s not get ahead of ourselves now.”

***

Levi and Eren found a new apartment. They were cutting it close because school was starting in a week, but Levi had finally signed all the paperwork and now they could legally use this address for Eren’s registration.

Tomorrow, they were going to start packing frantically after finishing up Eren’s registration for Santa Rose Junior High. On Friday, Levi was going to check on Eren’s packing progress, and he was going to sigh heavily as he told Eren to sweep up the hair underneath the rug and repack everything because they had a limited number of boxes. On Saturday, Hanji was going to head down and helped them move everything with a batch of cookies that came from a questionable origin. On Sunday, Madeline was going to get back to him about that new shower cleaner that worked like a charm, and Levi was going to attempt to remove that annoying stain living in the corner of the shower in their new apartment. On Monday, Petra was going to drag him along with everyone in the office for another lunch out, and Levi would act like it was a chore even though he had fun last time he went with them.

Levi would sit back on his old couch some days afterwards, in their new apartment, Eren fast asleep on his shoulder again, and he would think about how much his life had changed, how a lot of it was because of Eren, and he would smile because no one was around to see as he attempted to carry Eren to bed, and Eren would be very heavy, _the damn brat._

Eren was going to a new school the next day. Hanji was going to leave in three months.

But new things would happen tomorrow. And the next day. And the day after that. Levi could feel the changes slowly growing inside him, but he wasn’t afraid because the space by his side was no longer empty.


End file.
